To Build Some Perspective

... go to a cemetery.  I must admit, I have been in a semi funk lately.  Medical bills from my arm thing are rolling on in plus we had a fairly expensive winter.  It is just frustrating to think that little nest egg we had is not so much anymore.  I was again feeling sorry for myself this morning as Chad had to pay his passport fee for his mission trip this summer...

...and then Bennett and I decided to go by and visit GrandpaGordie's grave spot.  It was GrandpaGordie's birthday yesterday.  I had fully intended to take the boys and go release balloons but EVERY SINGLE night this week is slammed with activities... like multiple activities every night.

Bennett squatting down looking at GrandpaGordie's grave spot.  I like the flower and flags GrandmaDean!

Despite the busy schedule, Bennett and I went to the cemetery this morning.  I bought two balloons and let Bennett release one and then let the older 3 release one when they got home from school.  I love the logic of children.  I was thinking it was a sweet gesture, but it totally went over Ashton and Shepherd's heads that we were giving a balloon to someone that had died.  When I told Shepherd that he was going to actually let it go for GrandpaGordie's birthday, he matter of factly said, "but he is dead." I tried to then explain symbolism.

Bennett getting ready to let go of the balloon.  He thought it was so funny floating away.

Has this sign always been here?  Obviously, we didnt obey it.

He loved feeding the ducks as well. But honestly would have been happy going around and watching all the "tractors" mowing the grass around the cemetery.  This kid LOVES tractors or any moving machine that makes noise.

It was just what I needed.  I gained some perspective.
1- I still have a fully functioning arm that has no cancer.  My arm may have a scar and I may be paying for it for a while but that is all it is... a scar.
2- Though our cars are old, they are still running.  They may need new tires and belts and other things that I cant remember that cost so much but they are running.
3- My husband has the opportunity to serve in another country.  Chad gets to go teach Polish men about football and God for a week this summer.  Yeah, it is pretty expensive, but we are trusting in God's faithfulness.
4- I have never had to bury a child, a parent, or a spouse.  I looked around the graveyard today and realize how easily it could be me that someone is visiting or one of my kids that I am visiting.  This money stuff is so small in the big picture.  I just found out this week that on Sunday, a guy that I played soccer with in college was killed by a drunk driver.  He left behind a wife and 2 young children.  How easily could it directly affect me?
5-  You dont ever really outgrow feeding ducks.  It really is therapeutic.

The older 3 releasing the 2nd balloon.

Balloon number 2 flying off.

Though I didnt expect to "make a memory" today, I did.  I learned a continuing lesson in thankfulness.  It really is a quest- to find joy- to experience His graces day in and day out.

Happy Happy Birthday GrandpaGordie!  We love you and still miss you!